Choice, Do We Want It?

Having the ability to choose is the most beautiful and amazing gift in life.

Before anything else, the one thing that unites every human being is choice. Having that ability to think and form a thought and then decide to either think a certain way or act a certain way is amazing. From birth to old people in diapers we all are faced with choices constantly.

I’ve found people misunderstand this gift. So many people today take that ability for granted. Myself included on most days. Because it’s always been there we just…. don’t even think about it most of the time. So many people don’t even want it. They love having people tell them what to think, believe, or do. Buy this, pray to this god, don’t smoke MJ, do smoke MJ, smoke cigarettes, don’t smoke cigarettes, drink coffee, don’t marry that person, go to this school, watch this movie….ect. We are constantly surrounded by people trying to take our ability to choose away. I feel, we let them. I find more often then not, people find a group of other people to do their thinking for them. I think this is commonly found in organized religion but it is found in other places as well, such as our bipartisan government. Republican vs Democrat. Muslim vs Christian. Not to mention the propaganda  and fear tactics that are fed to us on any news program.

People don’t like or want to do their own research because its toooooo haaaaaaard. Just like they don’t want to eat healthy even though it could save their children’s lives and later, their health problems. Not to mention their own health problems. It’s just too hard to go to Whole Foods or Sprouts and buy quality grocery’s and take them home, pick out a healthy recipe, and cook it. It is soooo muuuuuch easieeeeer to go to Red Robin and order a somewhat delicious burger that has so many additives our gut screams at us with weird BM’s. Not to mention, it has been proven so many times that eating out is just plain more expensive. So you’re not even saving money! They just aren’t weird enough to make it a problem, I guess? They would rather take prescription drugs… because that is so much more convenient than actually fixing the problem. Lets just put a bandaid on a gaping wound.

It would be soooo much easier to pretend that Global Warming (oh i’m sorry… climate change) isn’t happening. To acknowledge it exists is an acknowledgement that we have to change. People don’t like change, they fear it. In order to change, we must first make a decision, we must first make a choice.

Making a decision is hard and takes research and a lot of pondering, but I wouldn’t trade my ability to choose for anything. It takes looking at multiple view points and maybe not choosing any but coming up with your own, possibly better idea. It makes us human and it means we are alive. I like being alive, thank you very much.

To be afraid of choice happens, but we can choose not to succumb to that fear and be brave. Be our own people and don’t forget EVERYONE THINKS DIFFERENTLY. There is no one way to do anything. It’s part of the beauty and variety of life. I will admit wholeheartedly that when I get stuck on an idea or an action that I think could benefit many people, I share it. But there is a difference between sharing an idea, accepting its not for the people you’ve shared it with (at least at that moment) and then not persecute them for it.

I don’t agree with my family on a lot of things and I don’t like it when they disagree  with me. But I’m constantly working on accepting them for who they are and the decisions they make because in the end, I don’t have to live with their choices, they do. I can offer a perspective, and they can take it or leave. Most of the time they basically say I don’t know what I’m talking about and I’ll gain all the wisdom they have when I get older. Nothing infuriates and insults me more than that irrational, silly statement that with age comes wisdom. A child in their innocence can be wiser than an 92 year old priest.

Sometimes, it would be nice if they just said, I get you don’t agree but this is why I don’t agree with you. I pray for the day when I can have a real conversation with them without them immediately dismissing what I have to say so that they can follow it with how I just don’t know anything and that my way of thinking is wrong instead of just different. I think they represent a whole bunch of people who react like this when someone doesn’t live the same as they do or think the same as they do. They continually surround themselves with only one way of thinking and it completely blinds them from the rest of the world. It makes their god smaller along with their universe. It makes it harder to think that this world is changing and we need to change with it or become extinct. Its hard to acknowledge there is anything else besides our own way of thinking if we only surround ourselves…with our own way of thinking. It completely dismissing individuality which was God’s most precious gift. Our individuality is so deep within us and such an amazing gift that it is even written among our unique DNA. No person is alike. DNA is even changed based on our thoughts and emotions. That uniqueness cannot be stomped out by any group or thought. They’ll try because it makes it easier for us to be used and taken advantage of, but we can overcome and we can remember to love.

I used to be in that same predicament. Thinking it was my way or the highway. I’m not even remotely done growing or learning to be the best version of myself, but I hope I’ve come a long way. I truly believe one of our deepest human desires is to be loved and accepted. I still have my moments and I still catch myself thinking ridiculously close minded judgmental thoughts but I strive not to lie to myself that I am perfect or that I know everything this world has to offer. I love growing and changing and finding the best possible way to approach a situation. I like being healthy and cooking my own hand picked food. I desire to have a healthy mind AND spirit. Forward, ever forward.

This was an opinion piece! Thank you so much for reading if you made it this far. Love you all!

Last word of the day, Choice. Just remember to choose. Be grateful for it.

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The Case for Slow Programming

This is very well said and also very true. I would also say this applies to man other activities we partake in where we bypass the processes in order to try and make things happen faster. Faster doesn’t mean better.

Nature -> Brain -> Technology

My dad used to say, “Slow down, son. You’ll get the job done faster.”

I’ve worked in many high-tech startup companies in the San Francisco Bay area. I am now 52, and I program slowly and thoughtfully. I’m kind of like a designer who writes code; this may become apparent as you read on 🙂

Programming slowly was a problem for me when I recently worked on a project with some young coders who believe in making really fast, small iterative changes to the code. At the job, we were encouraged to work in the same codebase, as if it were a big cauldron of soup, and if we all just kept stirring it continuously and vigorously, a fully-formed thing of wonder would emerge.

It didn’t.

Many of these coders believed in thefallacy that all engineers are fungible, and that no one should be responsible for any particular…

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Song of the Day – Turn On Me by The Shins

This was the perfect song for this past month or so for me. It is called Turn On Me by The Shins, a great band with great messages in many of their songs.The whole song meaning revolves around falling out with a former band member, they had issues like most relationships do. This was huge because recently in my own relationships (mostly my man) I had the revelation that in any relationship that has potential, whether its platonic or romantic, if there is that missing aspect of communication then it will be doomed. It amazes me that if we tweaked only a few of the ways we communicate with that significant other, it can completely change everything and it will grow. If we refuse to change or back down and remain in our stubborn societal mindset of “I’m the center of the universe and I’m more important than everyone else,” inevitably we will be setting our relationships up for failure.

So affections fade away,
And do adults just learn to play
The most ridiculous, repulsive games?
On the faith of ruddy sons,
And the double-barreled guns,
You better hurry,
Rabbit, run, run, run.
‘Cause meeting you was fun,
And there’s a lot of hungry howlers in this one cell.
We’re taking it over,
Their brittle, thorny stems,
They break before they bend,
And neither one of us is one of them.

All it takes is a little humility, respect for the human person, and forgiveness. I’m sure easier said than done, but these are simple concepts that our own stubborn pride can make complicated. All the same, it does take two to tango. If it doesn’t work out, get back on that horse and ride!! Never forget hope and forgiveness.

So I took your licks at the time,
And to change like that is just so hard to do,
Hard to do.
Don’t let it whip-crack your life,
And bow out from the fight,
Those old pious sisters were right
The worst part is over,
Now, get back on that horse and ride.

Our Personal Growth Stunt

“I suppose it is tempting, if the only tool you have is a hammer, to treat everything as if it were a nail.”
Abraham Maslow, Toward a Psychology of Being

When false assumptions are mentioned, I usually think they mean the assumption was a bad one. Which, I’m sure everyone has done that at one point or another. We do the whole, judge a book by its cover whether we like to admit it or not. However, in going through lists of people in my head and through my Facebook feed I find more often than not that a lot of people I’ve made assumptions about have all been relatively good, only to be let down. My first impression of people I take only the good and I’m blind to the bad, only to be either told by someone later that so and so really isn’t that great of a person because of blah blah blah or through experiences of backstabbing and lazy friendships.  I expect the best from people and try not to ever make bad suppositions. In other words, I wear my heart on my sleeve. Which might sound like a great practice, but notice the “let down.” I think its important to emphasize that we not make any extra good or extra bad assumptions period. It puts too much pressure on someone you’ve just met and they can do nothing but disappoint. It’s not to say lower standards or limit possibilities. Just don’t assume anything about a person and take them as they are. That is the best way to value the people you are surrounded by. That is the way you won’t be disappointed and they won’t have a complex to deal with. Otherwise you are going to get stuck in thoughts like, “I thought he/she was better than that,” or “I can’t believe they let that happen!” It is an extra emotional roller coaster that no one needs, and it stunts our personal growth.

Side note….. I think my false assumptions are more oriented around objects. It boils down to whenever I lose something, I have a bad habit of naturally assuming I wasn’t the one who lost it. However, I lose stuff all the time so it’s a rather safe assumption that I was, in fact, the person to misplace whatever it is that is lost.

“Your assumptions are your windows on the world. Scrub them off every once in a while, or the light won't come in.”  ― Isaac Asimov

“Your assumptions are your windows on the world. Scrub them off every once in a while, or the light won’t come in.”
― Isaac Asimov

This was in response to The Daily Prompt!

 

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